Flamingos die at hands of fraternity brother

October 10th, Columbia, South Carolina–A University of South Carolina student killed two flamingos as he attempted to steal one from the Hattiesburg Zoo for his fraternity’s scavenger hunt game.

The student, Devin Norris, got into an altercation with one flamingo while attempting to steal said flamingo’s mate. The female bird was rushed to a hospital the next morning, and the male’s lifeless body was found next to her. Both flamingos did not survive the holly jolly antics of Pi Kappa Alpha.

Sure, the student who did it got what he deserved, but the fraternity just got a month’s suspension. They came up with the idea and pushed the kid to do it, but they were only faced with a thirty-day hold on their partying and games. What a punishment. How ever will they survive it? Maybe a nice alcohol and drug filled party will help them recuperate. If they can stay sober for the next thirty days, that is.

These kinds of antics and stunts go on all the time, and no one feels the need to carefully watch these houses full of drunken idiots? A month-long hold isn’t enough. How about probation and surprise inspections?

Bet the “pranks” would stop then!

And before anyone goes burning the student at the stake and saying that only he should be held accountable, remember: he has to live with the fact that he lost a fight to a female flamingo for the rest of his life.

Plus, there’s probably a bounty on his head as the Hattiesburg Zoo’s flamingos plan their own fun little prank on Pi Kappa Alpha.

Or not, but a girl can dream.

Flamingos

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